chatdong

[22:52] <monkeylic_> night fellas
[22:52] * monkeylic_ has quit IRC
[22:53] <Nermy> i’m gonna follow monkeylice and rape him
[22:53] * Nermy has quit IRC (Quit: rape)

<Roland_of_Gilead> jiffy kristen bell is just too cute
<&jiffy> who
<Roland_of_Gilead> kristen bell
<Roland_of_Gilead> you jackass
<&jiffy> who
<Roland_of_Gilead> www.kingmuffin.net/toocute.wmv
<Roland_of_Gilead> www.kingmuffin.net/toocute2.wmv
<&jiffy> who is she
<Roland_of_Gilead> Veronica Mars
<Roland_of_Gilead> Chloe from Smallville
<&jiffy> great i don’t care
<Roland_of_Gilead> view the wmvs
<Roland_of_Gilead> she is just too cute
<&jiffy> well ok smallville alright i will trust you
<&jiffy> even though that show is pretty terrible i could not quit watching it
<Roland_of_Gilead> i quit after every 10 minutes someone slapped lana lang or whatever
<Roland_of_Gilead> YES SUPERMAN IS JEALOUS WE ALL GET IT
<&jiffy> yeah it is pretty awful now i saw an ep of whatever season they are on now and was like
<&jiffy> wow
<&jiffy> this is awful
<Roland_of_Gilead> haven’t seen an episode since season 1
<Atmosfear> um
<&jiffy> like um season 8 so clark is like 23 and the most powerful person ever why is he still in smallville
<Atmosfear> man
<Roland_of_Gilead> except I do have that .avi of kristen kreuk or whatever swimming
<&jiffy> yeah
<&jiffy> i quit after like 3 seasons
<&jiffy> although i have 4-6 but dunno if i will ever bother with them
<Atmosfear> if i ever am tryin to have sex with teenagers on the internet
<Roland_of_Gilead> umm last episode I remember is umm
<Atmosfear> and the girl ever tells me to hang on a second but she made me some sweet tea
<Roland_of_Gilead> he helped someo ther alien make a spaceship
<&jiffy> haha
<Atmosfear> i am going to be like “hey Chris Hansen how ya durrin”
<&jiffy> man you missed the aquaman episode
<Roland_of_Gilead> there was an aquaman episode?
<&jiffy> yeah
<&jiffy> he hit on lois lane
<Roland_of_Gilead> haha
<&jiffy> it was like um aquaman is a faggot
<&jiffy> and he wore green shorts and an orange tanktop how creative
<&jiffy> it’s like his costume!!
<Roland_of_Gilead> i only saw like 2 episodes with lois lane
<Roland_of_Gilead> lol
<&jiffy> she is pretty retarded
<&jiffy> dawson’s creek with super powers
<&jiffy> dat is the show
<Roland_of_Gilead> Erica Durance eh
<Roland_of_Gilead> lol
<&jiffy> yeah pretty much
<Roland_of_Gilead> jiffy watch www.kingmuffin.net/toocute.wmv
<Roland_of_Gilead> she is just too cute
<&jiffy> yeah hold on god
<Roland_of_Gilead> also she is the reporter c hick from smallville
<&jiffy> i know
<&jiffy> !
<&jiffy> shut up a second god
<&jiffy> but yes she is one of the few blondes i find attractive although she suffers from cameron diaz occasional hotness syndrome
<Roland_of_Gilead> she may be just occasionally hot, but she is always too cute
<&jiffy> she wasn’t really cute in 1.wmv
<Roland_of_Gilead> :-\
<&jiffy> also that doesn’t even look like her
<&jiffy> are you sure that is her
<Roland_of_Gilead> it is her
<&jiffy> if you say so
<Roland_of_Gilead> oh oh i am wrong
<Roland_of_Gilead> she tried to be chloe and failed
<&jiffy> TOLD YOU
<Roland_of_Gilead> allison mack is chloe
<&jiffy> TOLD YOU
<&jiffy> TOLD YOU
<&jiffy> TOLD YOU
<&jiffy> TOLD YOU
<Roland_of_Gilead> you got me
<&jiffy> i got you!
<Roland_of_Gilead> you got me!
<&jiffy> allison mack is cuter than whoever that chick is
<&jiffy> kristen bell you say
<&jiffy> whatevs
<Roland_of_Gilead> i dislike allison mack
<&jiffy> yeah CDOHS is a terrible disease
<&jiffy> blondes are most susceptible
<Roland_of_Gilead> allison mack is german
<&jiffy> although those like ashley judd also suffer from it
<&jiffy> i would like the phrase cameron diaz occasional hotness syndrome to enter general parlance
<&jiffy> it’s an important phenomenon that needs more attention
<Roland_of_Gilead> yeah
<Roland_of_Gilead> you could just start using it in everyday conversation
<Roland_of_Gilead> since everyone knows what it means
<&jiffy> i have said it irl a few times
<Roland_of_Gilead> me too
<&jiffy> that exact phrase what
<&jiffy> if so you had better attribute it
<&jiffy> cite your sources
<&jiffy> some guy from the internet is acceptable

[00:35] <ozzy> fuck you pvam
[00:35] * ozzy has quit IRC
[00:35] <villefort> ozzy caved in!
[00:35] <villefort> i win!
[00:35] * villefort is now known as villefort|sleep
[00:35] <jiffy> haha
[00:35] <jiffy> i win!
[00:35] * jiffy has quit IRC
[00:37] <victrola> haha
[00:37] <victrola> i’m winning

[19:06] <&cryosin> haha my friend just came into my room in near tears apparently her roommate has been really drunk for the past week and has been pissing all over their room whenever she feels like it
[19:07] <Nermy> wait what
[19:07] <&cryosin> yeah you read that right
[19:07] <Nermy> uhhhhhhhhhh
[19:07] <ozzy> that is terribly unattractive
[19:08] <ozzy> well unless you are into that
[19:08] <&jiffy> why do people have roommates like this
[19:09] <ozzy> surprise hammer
[19:09] <ozzy> nermy here is a tip the hammer can hit through walls/floors
[19:09] <Nermy> hammer is so inneffective
[19:09] <ozzy> there is a real surprise hammer
[19:09] <ozzy> yeah i hate it
[19:10] <Nermy> I do not understand why hammering someone in the shins does LESS damage than anywhere else
[19:10] <Nermy> or like busting kneecaps
[19:10] <ozzy> it doesnt matter where you hit anyone
[19:10] <&hobs> uh
[19:11] <&hobs> man if my roomate pissed on my room, if they still had their urethra not stopped up by a gluegun they would count themselves lucky
[19:12] <Nermy> if hobs’ roommate pissed on his room hobs would call papa kokkinos
[19:12] <&hobs> no I know how to deal with my own problems
[19:12] <&hobs> papa kokkinos only comes if i am unable
[19:13] <&hobs> and that would be only situations like
[19:13] <&hobs> me vs a rampaging buffalo
[19:13] <&hobs> me vs juggernaut
[19:13] <Nermy> or if you are feeling vindictive
[19:13] <ozzy> get outta my head charles
[19:13] <&hobs> my dad would look in juggernauts eyes and tears of pitch would come streaming out of jugs sockets
[19:13] <&hobs> he would scream until he plunged into the sea
[19:14] <ozzy> i would like to meet that dad
[19:15] <&cryosin> my dad would be very pissed and loud but he wouldnt actually do anything other than shout
[19:15] <&cryosin> if my roommate pissed everywhere
[19:15] <Nermy> cryosin calls up papa kokkinos
[19:16] <&jiffy> my dad is huge so when he gets mad people just cower it is pretty funny
[19:16] <&jiffy> it’s like they forget he is 50+ years old and really fat
[19:16] <ozzy> rub his nose in it
[19:16] <&hobs> my dad laughs when he is angry
[19:16] <&hobs> it is like listening to your own death

<@BuM> rofl some of these comments…
<@BuM> my cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a plane to New Mexico when all of the sudden the hydraulics went. The plane started spinning around, going out of control, so he decides it’s all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad. So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, whe
<+hobostotle> that is an old story that is fake
<+hobostotle> like 20+ years old
<@BuM> ITS FUNNY SO FU
<+hobostotle> not if you heard it copy and pasted on the internet for the 400th time
<@BuM> THATS THE FIRST TIME SO FU
<@BuM> FOR ME SO FU
<@monkeylice> hob you should probably know that BuM hooked up with a former APUer for the purposes of engaging in homosexual sexual intercourse
<@monkeylice> the man under discussion was named Mitch, and he drove a pickup and had a dog named Birdy
<@monkeylice> hence his handle HEREBIRDY
<@BuM> 🙁
<@BuM> one of many many regrets in my life
<@BuM> homosexual sexual intercourse
<@BuM> YAAAY
<@monkeylice> care to elaborate, BuM?
<+hobostotle> uh
<+hobostotle> why did I need to know he is dumb
<+hobostotle> I already got that from chain letter copy pasta
<@monkeylice> well
<@monkeylice> however little respect you were going to give BuM
<@monkeylice> drop it a few notches
<+hobostotle> I am pretty sure I cant respect him so little that I actually draw some sort of gaseous form of it from his body
<+hobostotle> not over the internet at least
<@monkeylice> well, BuM actually has glands in his skin that excretes disrespect
<@bash> im so lonely right now
<@bash> monkeylice cmere lemme pound ur fuckin face out
<@monkeylice> no bash I don’t fuck guys who don’t have cars
<@bash> FAGGOT
<@bash> I HATE YOU
<@monkeylice> I mean I don’t fuck guys
<+hobostotle> you mean “I dont fuck”
<+hobostotle> (low blow whapah)
<@bash> DIE IN A FIRE
<+hobostotle> hey bash
<@monkeylice> hobostotle that’s not true, I have sex with animals all the time
<+hobostotle> I would say suck my dick but I would rather not get a social disease
<@monkeylice> like bash’s mother
<@Rash> hiiiiiiiiii
<@monkeylice> hi rash
<@monkeylice> you see, hobostotle, one of our primary objects, or at least my primary objective, was to get BuM to kill himself
<@monkeylice> since he has been on welfare his entire life and is depraved and will eventually rape and murder children
<@Rash> mine too
<@monkeylice> but I lost interest
<@Rash> this beer gives me headache ;[
<@Rash> thasts why i am up at 0343
<+hobostotle> he is on welfare
<+hobostotle> ahhahahaahha
<+hobostotle> ahahahahahah
<@Rash> yes
<+hobostotle> even I, the stupidest, least motivated man in the world am good enough to not be on welfare
<@Rash> has been since foreber
<+hobostotle> because I have something called a dick
<@Rash> only bnecause his mom is or some shit
<+hobostotle> it keeps me off welfare
<@Rash> dont get me started on bums eorthless ass
<@Rash> i need to go back to bed
<@monkeylice> well, I think dick or balls is requisite
<@monkeylice> it’s kind of impressive that BuM will live his whole miserable life without contributing anything at all to anyone
<+hobostotle> haha
<+hobostotle> man welfare
<+hobostotle> only niggers are on welfare!
<@monkeylice> his greatest accomplishment in life is taking a screenshot of someone typing “asshole” in WOW
<+hobostotle> they are not even full humans!
<+hobostotle> they are not even full humans!
<+hobostotle> they are not even full humans!
<+hobostotle> they are not even full humans!
<+hobostotle> haha man
<+hobostotle> I have never talked to a white person who is on welfare
<+hobostotle> poor yes
<+hobostotle> welfare no
<+hobostotle> I would rather eat dirt
<@monkeylice> well I was on welfare when I was born
<@monkeylice> for like less than a year I think
<+hobostotle> yeah but look at you now
<@monkeylice> since my mom was fresh out of the army and divorced my father etc
<@monkeylice> well hob,I am a pretty fail person
<@monkeylice> but way more useful than BuM
<+hobostotle> also it is different because of things like that
<+hobostotle> you cant justify a decade of that
<+hobostotle> welfare is supposed to be a net to catch people who get totally fucked
<@monkeylice> he is like 24 or something
<+hobostotle> and then they bounce back
<+hobostotle> and get off fucking welfare
<+hobostotle> because the social stigma associated with it is like worse than if you wore electric retard comics on your face into a synagogue
<@monkeylice> well I dunno if BuM socializes at all outside of the apu and wow anymore
<@monkeylice> this is a person who has worn out fleshlights
<@BuM> I’m glad I give you people enjoyment in my sadness
<@monkeylice> we’re not really enjoying it, BuM
<@monkeylice> we’re disgusting
<@monkeylice> but disgust is entertaining
<+hobostotle> bum your sadness is a stupid construct you have built to justify your ultimate worthlessness
<+hobostotle> instead of being fag, go better yourself so you at least dont have to be on welfare
<+hobostotle> god you make me sick
* ChanServ sets mode: +o Celeron_12ghz
* Celeron_12ghz is now known as orac
<@monkeylice> BuM has cable tv
<+hobostotle> do I have cable tv
<+hobostotle> no
<+hobostotle> am I poor as balls
<+hobostotle> yes
<@monkeylice> me neither
<+hobostotle> am I on welfare
<@monkeylice> same
<@monkeylice> nope
<+hobostotle> no, because I have one thing you dont
<+hobostotle> its called self respect
<+hobostotle> and its worth more than cable tv
<+hobostotle> faggot
<+hobostotle> god you are like a nigger mixed with a martian
<+hobostotle> seriously you are the worst human being I know
<+hobostotle> at least murderers have some self respect
<+hobostotle> they think what they are doing is right
<+hobostotle> you are just pond scum floating the surface
<+hobostotle> you disgust me
<+hobostotle> you dont even have the courage to sink like a proper piece of shit
<+hobostotle> you just float and make me flush 3 times to get the taste of you out of my mouth
<@monkeylice> hob he is really just the shit rubbing that sticks to the bowl
<+hobostotle> im glad we had this talk about how you are worse than excrement
<@BuM> I like how passionate and furious the writings about me are in this channel. I expect to recieve death threats soon. ROFL
<@monkeylice> BuM it’s not worth it for us to kill you
<@BuM> a place for fags to rag on other fags because they dont get free money
<@monkeylice> we just want you to see the logic behind you ending your own life
<+hobostotle> I wouldn’t kill you
<+hobostotle> it would be more draining then anything your awful self has ever achieved
<@BuM> at age 18, my mother got me on social security, I found out I was on it at age 19
<+hobostotle> it would be like a death orgy of pain creation and time wasting as your last act
<@monkeylice> HOW OLD ARE YOU NOW, BUM?
<@BuM> 25
<@BuM> I think
<@BuM> err yea 25
<+hobostotle> 26 years old and you are worth the same as a 14 year old girl, and you dont even have a vagina
<@monkeylice> actually
<@monkeylice> I don’t want BuM to kill himself
<@monkeylice> at least, not until after his mother dies
<@BuM> you don’t even know me. all you know is how I recieve money
<@BuM> get over it.
<+hobostotle> I know you are 26 on welfare
<@monkeylice> BUM YOU’RE THE GUY WHO GIVES DETAILED DESCRIPTIONS ABOUT SODOMIZING YOURSELF WITH A PLUNGER
<@BuM> why dont you redneck fags go join the minutemen at the border and do semigay things to eachother while sipping on cheap beer
<+hobostotle> that is enough for me to know that I am an impossible to define amount better than you
<@monkeylice> BuM maybe we will do that since it is actually doing something and not sitting around on welfare
<@BuM> I’m 25 not 26
<+hobostotle> impossibly large
<+hobostotle> whatever shitbag it dont matter
<+hobostotle> you’re 0 as far as society is concerned
<@BuM> why did you feel it so important to attempt to correct me when I said I was 25.
<+hobostotle> since you’ve contributed fucking 0 and all you gave back was piss and shit
<@BuM> in your righteous mind you felt that I was lieing and needed to say 26 instead
<@BuM> I dont understand
<@BuM> I’m glad I live in california.
<@monkeylice> when BuM kills himself I’m going to burn his social security card and delete his wow account so history has no memory of him whatsoever
<+hobostotle> see now you are trying to change the subject from how you are a shitstain on the underwear of society to number dumbshits and where you live
<+hobostotle> how can you even justify owning a computer and internet and wow when you dont even work
<@BuM> this no longer amuses me. go away.
<+hobostotle> god you are such a fucking woman
* You were kicked by BuM (BuM)
* Attempting to rejoin channel #apu
* Rejoined channel #apu
* Topic is ‘Ass Perv U’
* Set by BuM on Sat Nov 10 01:47:18
* monkeylice sets mode: +o hobostotle
* BuM sets mode: +b *!*@cloak-C741065E.hsd1.mn.comcast.net
* You were kicked by BuM (BuM)
* Attempting to rejoin channel #apu
* Unable to join channel (address is banned)
* Rejoined channel #apu
* Topic is ‘Ass Perv U’
* Set by BuM on Sat Nov 10 01:47:18
<hobostotle> laughlauhalughag
<@BuM> eh whatever. enjoy talking over the internet to eachother about ME
* monkeylice sets mode: +o hobostotle
<@monkeylice> hahaha
<@hobostotle> I am enjoying baiting you, because you are a worthless human being and should be forced into manual labor for the betterment of mankind
<@hobostotle> chaingang
<@monkeylice> now let us never speak of bum again in hopes that he kills himself tonight and is forgotten
<@hobostotle> mlice you know what
<@monkeylice> forever
<@hobostotle> if he kills himself im going to write a eulogy for him
<@monkeylice> ?
<@hobostotle> im serious
<@hobostotle> and it will just say
<@hobostotle> “here lies a man who finally realized what needed to be done, which is a true mark of a man”
<@monkeylice> hahahhahaa
<@hobostotle> “in death he finally redeemed himself”
<@hobostotle> “amen”
<@hobostotle> his headstone would just say
<@hobostotle> man
<@monkeylice> you still wouldn’t be able to get a dog to piss on his grave
<@hobostotle> and the moment when he killed himself to the moment he killed himself
<@monkeylice> hahahaha
<@hobostotle> since that is the only time he would have been truly alive
<@monkeylice> well
<@monkeylice> when you put it that way
<@monkeylice> I would toast to his name
<@monkeylice> and then forget him forever
<@hobostotle> there you go
<@hobostotle> a dead man has outlived his usefulness anyway, unless he can teach us a lesson there is no reason to discuss him
<@hobostotle> and the lesson can be learned just by looking at the stone

[08:24] <solzhenitsyn> WHICH ONE IS YOUR POOP monkeylice http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b4/Bristol_Stool_Chart.png
[08:24] <@dad> well you could always just eat them
[08:24] <@dad> that would clear out some space
[08:24] <monkeylic_> I want to smuggle a dead prostitute into a space shuttle
[08:24] <@dad> that is what we cool the amerikkkan dream
[08:24] <victrola> would make a great broadcast from NASA
[08:24] <@dad> call*
[08:24] <monkeylic_> type 4-6
[08:24] <victrola> about time they had some real entertainment
[08:24] <@dad> hah fail
[08:24] <@dad> i am like 2-4
[08:24] <victrola> i mean you can only blow up so many shuttles before most people stop caring
[08:25] <@dad> warhawk what article is that from
[08:25] <monkeylic_> victrola that sounds like a challenge
[08:25] <victrola> it is
[08:25] <solzhenitsyn> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Diarrhea
[08:25] <monkeylic_> dad grose I would not eat a hooker
[08:25] <monkeylic_> not a dead one, anyway
[08:25] <monkeylic_> I might slowly eat a living one
[08:26] <solzhenitsyn> the best poop is type 3 because its the most satisfying
[08:26] <victrola> enjoy the moment (and taste)
[08:26] <victrola> you better wash your food first monkeylice you don’t know where it’s been
[08:26] <@dad> well warhawk
[08:26] <@dad> 3 with a tinge of 4
[08:26] <monkeylic_> yeah, after a nice type 2 or 3 (if I’m in the right mood) it makes me want to smoke a cigarette
[08:26] <@dad> if it’s too hard i mean that’s just fail
[08:26] <@dad> 2s are fail
[08:26] <@dad> theyre like shitting concrete
[08:27] <solzhenitsyn> 4 is gross
[08:27] <solzhenitsyn> 1 will make you want to kill yourself
[08:27] <victrola> a good no 3 makes you feel great afterwards
[08:27] <monkeylic_> type 2-5 descriptions can almost be used to describe penises, too
[08:27] <monkeylic_> like sirioth is a type 5
[08:27] <@dad> 3/4 is the perfect mix
[08:27] <monkeylic_> soft blob with clear-cut edges (easily passed)
[08:27] <@dad> haha man i hardly ever have type 5
[08:28] <monkeylic_> I am type 4
[08:28] <@dad> the perfect turd is a 3/4.
[08:28] <monkeylic_> like a sausage or a snake, smooth and soft
[08:28] <@dad> the perfect turd is a 3/4.
[08:28] <@dad> the perfect turd is a 3/4.
[08:28] <monkeylic_> DAD WE’RE TALKING ABOUT PENISES NOW
[08:28] <victrola> this is not a judging panel for best turd of show
[08:28] <monkeylic_> AND YOU’RE NOT EVEN ACCOUNTING FOR TASTE
[08:28] <@dad> oh
[08:28] <monkeylic_> (pun intended)
[08:28] <@dad> well the best dique is obviously 7
[08:28] <solzhenitsyn> sirioth poop is probably shaped like music notes
[08:28] <victrola> inches
[08:28] <@dad> liquid cock comin’ atcha
[08:29] <monkeylic_> http://ratemypoo.com/
[08:29] *** solzhenitsyn was kicked from #flames by dad (that doesnt make any sense }:[)
[08:29] *** solzhenitsyn (~WarHawk@Rizon-A7111B4D.hsd1.md.comcast.net) joined
[08:29] <victrola> lol monkeylice
[08:29] <&hobs> my penis is the best
[08:29] <@dad> oh god
[08:29] <@dad> the “best”ones are all pretty disgusting
[08:29] <monkeylic_> man I hate it that ratemyboobies.com is a godamn shock site these days
[08:30] <victrola> that one with the unheathy green tinge, like it had been nuked
[08:30] <victrola> wow
[08:30] <monkeylic_> http://www.ratemypoo.com/pictures/000000741/70531/ this one is making me lul
[08:30] <monkeylic_> it’s the Halo
[08:30] <@dad> http://ratemypoo.com/pictures/000000031/224356/
[08:30] <@dad> that would be a pleasurable turd to pass
[08:31] <victrola> GOD POO
[08:31] <monkeylic_> haha
[08:31] <monkeylic_> it takes a strong man to admit shitting is pleasant
[08:31] <monkeylic_> fucking faggot
[08:31] <@dad> well i mean
[08:31] <@dad> it takes an even stronger man to freeze a turd then fuck himself in the ass with said turd?
[08:31] <@dad> wait would that work?
[08:31] <&hobs> yes
[08:31] <victrola> maybe
[08:32] <@dad> wow
[08:32] <&hobs> unequivocally yes
[08:32] <victrola> hang on hobs how would you know
[08:32] <monkeylic_> it depends on how sharp the poo is
[08:32] <&hobs> I have been on the internet a long time dude
[08:32] <monkeylic_> obv a stronger man doesn’t need such sharp poo
[08:32] <solzhenitsyn> gross poops
[08:32] <solzhenitsyn> only my poop is pleasant to look at

[02:33] <Dube> lmao i went to school with a kid who had mutton chops
[02:33] <Dube> i mean MASSIVE mutoon chops
[02:33] <Dube> and this kid would shave and in 2 days he would have like 3 inch mutton chops
[02:33] <Dube> it was inhuman
[02:34] <ozzy> i knew a hairy kid like that
[02:34] <ozzy> we called him wolverine
[02:34] <ozzy> he killed himself
[02:34] <WarHawk> haha
[02:34] <WarHawk> hahaha
[02:34] <WarHawk> that is the best thing ozzy has ever said
[02:34] <Dube> oh man ozzy thats classic
[02:34] <thana> zing
[02:34] <ozzy> yeah i feel guilty
[02:35] <ozzy> wolverine was really a good guy at heart but when he looked at you you were like JESUS CHRIST

[23:51] <@Arsenic> man i had a delicious din din
[23:51] <@Arsenic> pollock with cajun spices
[23:52] <&Nermy> yum
[23:52] <@Arsenic> cajun is da way to go
[23:52] <&Nermy> personally i prefer haddock but you never know
[23:52] <mutton> polack with cajun spices
[23:52] <@Arsenic> all fish is delic
[23:52] <@Arsenic> rhymin like diamond
[23:52] <&Nermy> many people disagree!
[23:52] <&mp> oh yeah
[23:52] <&mp> today i had the strangest moment of my life
[23:52] <@Arsenic> the only bad fish is that cheap breaded shit you get for a dollar
[23:52] <&Nermy> did you see some dude in a dress sucking another guy’s dick?
[23:52] <&mp> my civ pro prof is the weirdest fucker there ever was but hes also oblivious and an idiot
[23:53] <&mp> anyway he does powerpoint presentations each lecture
[23:53] <&mp> so anyway this one slide comes up
[23:53] <&mp> and there’s an image of an anime school girl and you can see her panties
[23:53] <@Arsenic> haha
[23:53] <&mp> and nobody says anything
[23:53] <&Nermy> uh
[23:53] <&mp> and i was tempted to ask why there is a hentai upskirt shot on the screen
[23:53] <&mp> but i must have been hallucinating
[23:53] <&mp> it was the most frightening moment of my life
[23:54] <&mp> i thought i was about to hear the silent hill sirens and the walls would rust
[23:54] <&Nermy> what was the lecture about
[23:54] <&mp> personal jurisdiction
[23:54] <@Arsenic> yeah there is this one teacher at my friends school who had been fired multiple times for looking at porn and masturbating during school hours
[23:54] <@Arsenic> he works at a private school
[23:54] <@Arsenic> a christian private school
[23:55] <&Nermy> why would they keep rehiring him
[23:55] <@Arsenic> i dont know
[23:55] <Atmosfear> because he is a good teacher!
[23:55] <@Arsenic> hes got a weird mustache
[23:55] <@Arsenic> its layered

[08:08] <&jiffy> seriously though your bears should start adrian peterson #2 or garrett wolfe from your northern illinois and they would be a lot better off
[08:09] <@ozzy> do you know what northerns record is
[08:09] <&jiffy> 1-8
[08:09] <&jiffy> or 1-9 or something
[08:09] <&jiffy> but when they played wisconsin they were on their like 4th string defensive lineman i am not exaggerating
[08:10] <@ozzy> lol
[08:10] <@ozzy> yeah it is 1-8 god damn
[08:10] <&jiffy> yeah they had so many injuries it was hilarious
[08:10] <&jiffy> and then on the opening kickoff some guy broke his fucking leg
[08:10] <@ozzy> ahahaha
[08:11] <&jiffy> it’s like they were pulling the strongest guy off the cheerleading squad and putting him at linebacker at that point
[08:11] <@ozzy> when i go there i am going to sit on the bench and i will say throw me in coach im ready
[08:11] <@ozzy> i bet i will get to play
[08:11] <@ozzy> just wait
[08:12] <&jiffy> how big are you
[08:12] <@ozzy> 5’10” 170lbs
[08:12] <@ozzy> hehe
[08:12] <&jiffy> how slow are you
[08:13] <@ozzy> i am actually really fast
[08:13] <&jiffy> straight line speed or something useful
[08:13] <@ozzy> useful
[08:13] <&jiffy> you could probably play on the scout team in practice
[08:13] <&jiffy> by probably i mean almost certainly not
[08:14] <&jiffy> i dunno i don’t get the athlete vibe off you
[08:14] <@ozzy> jiffy i am from chicago i got to run from the popo :]
[08:14] <@ozzy> jiffy you dont
[08:14] <&jiffy> and the rapists oh wait you got caught
[08:14] <@ozzy> i played hockey for awhile
[08:14] <&jiffy> nah
[08:14] <@ozzy> but thats pretty much it
[08:14] <&jiffy> hockey skills don’t really translate to football except hitting/taking a hit
[08:14] <@ozzy> well jiffy that is why its called a joke
[08:14] <&jiffy> yeah
[08:15] <&jiffy> man i was a great HS cornerback
[08:15] <@ozzy> i mean they are getting desperate right
[08:15] <&jiffy> seriously
[08:15] <&jiffy> yeah you could probably try out and get laughed off the field
[08:15] <&jiffy> i mean the backups at a mid level college school probably run about a 4.6 40 yard dash and can bench 300+ lbs
[08:15] <&jiffy> and these are the guys who never play
[08:15] *** monkeylice quit (Remote host closed the connection)
[08:16] <@ozzy> yeah i could never see myself benching 300
[08:16] <&jiffy> yeah
[08:16] <&jiffy> i could bench my own weight that is it
[08:17] <&jiffy> but man i am a slow white guy even for a small wisconsin HS i was not fast
[08:17] <@ozzy> how much do you weigh
[08:17] <&jiffy> but nobody could ever get open against me
[08:17] <&jiffy> i weigh like 200 now but back in HS when i was in shape like 180
[08:17] <&jiffy> 6′ 180 lbs
[08:17] <&jiffy> i was the smartest player on the field 🙂
[08:18] <&jiffy> if i had a nigger’s athleticism i would be in the nfl right now
[08:18] <&jiffy> too bad!
[08:18] <@ozzy> well i am willing to bet you were the only person on the field who knew how to play dnd
[08:18] <&jiffy> i didn’t know anything about dnd back then
[08:18] <&jiffy> i only played 2 years i have this thing with my shoulders that whenever i tackled people they would come close to dislocating
[08:19] <&jiffy> so it is like well i don’t think playing for a terrible high school team is worth me having shoulder pain for the next fifty years
[08:19] <@ozzy> yep
[08:20] <@ozzy> i wish i would have continued with hockey but it got too expensive
[08:20] <@ozzy> not like it really matters anyways
[08:21] <@ozzy> man it is times like this when i ask myself why did i not go to bed 2 hours ago when everyone else did
[08:22] <@ozzy> damn internet
[08:23] <victrola> hey hey HEY
[08:23] <victrola> don’t you dare blame the internet for your failings
[08:23] <&jiffy> hey
[08:23] <&jiffy> going to bed is for faggots
[08:23] <&jiffy> you know who just went to bed
[08:23] <&jiffy> pvam
[08:23] <@ozzy> ouch
[08:24] <&jiffy> that is what we like to call damning evidence
[08:24] <@ozzy> i guess ill take my chances on the internet
[08:24] <&jiffy> internet gambler
[08:24] <victrola> odds of 10 to 1
[08:24] <@ozzy> summon chiyo
[08:24] <&jiffy> not even 2468 bog in don’t wait
[08:25] <&jiffy> what does that mean viki
[08:25] <victrola> it’s a saying from an ad i saw a long time ago
[08:25] <victrola> 2, 4, 6, 8, bog in, don’t wait
[08:25] <victrola> at the dinner table
[08:25] <&jiffy> oh
[08:26] <victrola> plus it was not a sequential number pattern
[08:26] <&jiffy> 2 4 6 8 who do we appreciate
[08:26] <&jiffy> i dunno lol
[08:26] <victrola> hobo
[08:26] <&jiffy> ho-bo! ho-bo! goooooooo costa!
[08:26] <&jiffy> do you have stupid fucking cheers and cheerleaders in your nation’s sporting events
[08:27] <victrola> not really
[08:27] <victrola> more like abuse
[08:27] <&jiffy> that is good to hear
[08:27] <victrola> it sure is
[08:27] <victrola> the sound of abuse fills my heart with glee
[08:28] <victrola> then abuse turns to violence
[08:28] *** jiffy changed topic to <victrola> the sound of abuse fills my heart with glee
[08:28] <victrola> nothing like turning up to a match and being entertained more by the crowd
[08:29] <&jiffy> well that is how it is in college athletics
[08:29] <&jiffy> pro sports we care about the game but college it is like let’s get hammered and yell at the other team’s fans
[08:30] <@ozzy> im gonna brawl some salukis
[08:30] <&jiffy> hehe

[18:30] <monkeylic_> when LA gets a team I hope they’re called the Los Angeles DICKSLAMMERS (this message was more meaningful but I can’t use bold text)
[18:30] <jiffy> DICKSLAMMERS
[18:30] <monkeylic_> ye
[18:30] <jiffy> pog memorial stadium
[18:30] <Nermy> they’d play space jam instead of the national anthem before games
[18:30] <jiffy> they certainly would
[18:31] <jiffy> national anthem is old and tired anyway
[18:31] <Nermy> their mascot would be Whammer, the Dick Slammer Hammer
[18:31] <monkeylic_> their logo would be an extreme closeup of Bo Jackson’s face
[18:31] <jiffy> one pore magnified 32,000x